A/N: This is just an outtake I wrote for Fandom4Preemies. Thank you all for helping them raise over $5K for the tiny babies. We can really do some great things in the fandom when we put the hate and jealousy aside. I hope to be a part of more things like this. I know a lot of you wanted to know what Donward was thinking so I gave you a short glimpse into his head. I hope you enjoy.
The smuttake and a real regular chapter for LAMTAF 2 will be up Christmas week. I am sorry for the delay, but real life has been hectic and I scrapped what I'd written twice. Babydoll and Donward live to confuse and trick me :) Leave a review or just have fun playing around. Let me know if there's something you would like to see me add to the blog.
Well I just heard the news today
It seems my life is going to change I closed my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face
With arms wide open Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place I'll show you everything
With arms wide open With arms wide open
Well I don't know if I'm ready To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath, I'll take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life
With Arms Wide Open-Creed
Holy shit! Can I do this? What the fuck do I know about raising a kid?
My ass was definitely not cut out for this shit. Not only had I fainted on my babydoll in the car, but I also let her down. She needed me to be strong and I was too into my own bullshit to help her. Not surprisingly, I felt like getting in the Phantom and going far away until Dante was born.
This active labor shit was definitely not for the faint of heart. My babydoll looked paler than ever. She squeezed the shit out of my hand as another contraction hit her hard. For such a small person, she had some super strength. After she let go, I shook out my arms, trying to regain circulations.
"You're doing so well, Bella," my mom cheered from the sidelines. That was easy for her to say. She wasn't the one being simultaneously cussed out and abused.
"You stupid, motherfucker! I'm never letting you touch me again, Edward! Fuck you," my babydoll cried, twisting away from me.
"I'm sorry, babydoll."
Snarling, she turned on me. "Sorry? Is that all you've got, husband. I'm pushing your ten pound baby out of a hole that barely accommodates your dick! I swear... I swear I'll never have sex again. This hurts."
I knew that was just the pain talking. There was no way in hell she could resist my cock. Besides, I was planning on us having a lot of kids, so she'd better get used to this part.
When I looked up, Ali was winking at me, as if she knew what I was thinking.
"Get out, Edward! I don't want you here. You did this to me! It hurts," Bella whimpered.
I didn't want her to be in pain, but I couldn't do anything about it. She was the one that chose to be brave and forgo the fucking drugs. I felt fucking frustrated. Slowly, I crawled over to the side where my mom and sisters were encouraging Bella.
Caressing her teary, silken cheeks, I made her look at me. "No matter what you say, I'm not fucking leaving. I'm sorry, babydoll. I swear to god I'd do it for you if I could. Just breathe, my angel. We'll get through this."
I meant every god-damn word, too. They would have had to kill my ass to get me out of the birthing pool.
Whether Bella liked it or not, I was going to be present for it all. My father hadn't been there for either me or Ali's births, so I was determined not to follow in his footsteps.
As I held my babydoll, I thought back to the night my sister was born.
"I want my mommy," I pleaded, holding my favorite blanket. It was a gift from my Dad and the flag of Italy was embroidered on the front. I carried it everywhere until I was around eight years old.
"Your mom is trying to bring you your new baby sister, Eddie. Be a good boy and you can have some milk and cookies," Di said, kissing my cheeks.
We were in a private area of the hospital. My mom had been building Legos with me in the playroom when she went into labor. Thankfully, Marcus and Di were early to the dinner my mom planned. They drove us and let me use the phone to call my father, but he didn't answer. I was too young then to know that he was probably with one of his bitches.
For hours, I was inconsolable. Being young and not understanding much, I thought that my mom was sick. Di offered me everything a kid could want but my tears never stopped. She was rocking me in her lap when the midwif e came out of the room. The woman had a huge smile on her red, sweaty face.
"It's a girl. She's beautiful. You all can go see her now," she informed, wiping her brow.
Di beamed, hoisting me onto her hip as Marcus ruffled my hair. He'd sent Caius out to look for my dad. My surrogate grandfather, Aro, was not happy that my father was missing yet another birth. The Mafia did a lot of shit, but family always came first.
When we got to the room, Esme was propped up on several pillows. In her arms was a tiny dark haired baby wrapped in a pink blanket. Di set me on the corner of the bed so that she could take the squirming baby.
"Oh, Esme, You're so lucky. I just wish... I wish I could...," she trailed off. Marcus kissed the top her head, whispering something in her ear. Di couldn't have children.
My mom smiled, shaking her head. "You stop that now, Didyme. Edward adores you and little Alice will, too."
Marcus bent down to kiss mom's forehead. I was really sad that my dad wasn't there. I was also jealous that everyone was paying attention to the little pink bundle and not me. To make myself known, I hopped of the bed and kicked over a chair.
Three pairs of adult eyes looked over at me. I pulled on the ends of my hair, ready for a fight. However, my mom had something else in mind. She shared a look with Di before motioning me over.
Marcus helped me climb back onto the bed. Then, Di handed mom the new baby. I scrunched up my nose, folding my arms over my chest. I was determined not to like this new person trying to steal my mother away from me.
"Edward, this is your baby sister, Alice. I want you to always protect her. You are her big brother. You're stronger, smarter, and bigger than she is. Will you take care of her?" Mom asked, helping me hold the baby in my arms.
Alice's face was scrunched up and her hair was spiky like mine, except it was dark. I kissed her cheeks because she was cute and it seemed like the thing to do. A flash went off somewhere behind me. Di and mom were always taking pictures of us.
"She's not so bad, for a girl," I said, grinning.
A minute later, Alice opened her eyes. They were milky and blue but very pretty. I promised her that I would show her the ropes and make sure that she stayed out of the trouble. The adults laughed as I told my sister all about our house.
The next day, my dad showed up. He'd sent a shitload of flowers to the room. After stopping to let me climb on his back, he walked over to the bed to see his new daughter. My mom looked at him with hate. As he kissed Alice's tiny head, I saw Esme shed a tear.
She whispered five words to him that I would never forget. "You should have been here."
"Edward… Earth to Edward... Where the hell are you? I'm the one pushing a baby out of my vagina," Bella screamed, drawing me back into the present.
Ignoring the anger in her voice, I kissed her on the head. No matter how hard this was, I was here. In my estimation, that was half the fucking battle. My son needed to know that he was loved and wanted by both parents, not just his mother.
"Push," Senna yelled, pressing down on my babydoll's bump.
"It fucking hurts!" Bell screamed, pressing her body into mine. I closed my eyes, willing the pain to come to me instead. I'd never been so fucking worthless in all my life.
"Babydoll, you can do it. Just push. Our son is almost here. He wants to see us. Help him," I pleaded, kissing her face.
With a determined look, she began to push for all that she was worth. I stopped to look, really look at my wife and lover. She was strong, beautiful, and courageous. Her dark hair was piled on top of her head and she was only wearing a bikini top, but she looked like a soldier ready for battle. I'd never been more proud in my whole fucking life. Not that I had any doubts, but going though this experience just proved that I'd chosen right.
As the women cheered for Bella from the sidelines, I massaged her lower back, whispering encouragement in her ear. I knew she didn't hear half of the shit I was saying but it made me feel like I was at least contributing.
I was holding her arm, when I started to see my son's head sliding out of her body. For a minute, I thought I was going to embarrass myself again and faint. Luckily, that didn't happen.
A minute later, my babydoll almost broke my fucking hand as the midwife lifted our son out of the water. It was a surreal moment. I felt like I was watching a movie about my life-fucking time stood still.
Dante was definitely a healthy baby. He screamed and flailed when my babydoll took him into her arms. I peeked over her shoulder, kissing it softly. She looked so fucking happy and my son... he was perfection. There weren't enough words to describe the miracle I'd just witnessed.
"My god… I didn't know… This is fucking amazing," I mumbled, staring at Dante Cullen, mi figlio.
Me, Edward-fucking-Cullen, I have a baby boy.
The first thing I noticed was how tiny and new he looked. My babydoll knew exactly how to hold him, supporting the head. She had been babysitting for years, so she was a pro at that shit. For the first time, I was the remedial, lost student. I had to let her lead.
D.C. had my eyes and hair, but his nose and lips belonged to my babydoll. Together we created something so perfect... I began to cry as I stared at him. For a monster like me, this was more than I'd ever imagined possible. All I could do was sob as I gently kissed my boy's tiny cheeks.
Eventually, I looked up, catching Bella's eye. "You are amazing, babydoll. I can never repay you for this. He's absolutely flawless." The diamonds, cars, houses...it all paled in comparison to Dante. Now, my main goal in life was to keep my wife and son safe and happy.
While I held our baby, my babydoll counted his fingers and toes. She blushed and smiled when she saw his "winky", as she called it. I had to laugh at that shit. My little tigress was just too fucking adorable in her new mommy role.
I kept kissing my son and saying, "I love you, Dante Cullen," over and over again.
Sometime later, I was handed a pair of scissors and told to cut the umbilical cord. Fortunately, my hand was steady while I did the task, but on the inside, I was a fucking emotional mess. The women almost blinded us with all the motherfucking pictures. I had to resist the urge to yell. I didn't want my son's first impression of me being mad as hell.
We stayed in the bloody water until the placenta came out of my babydoll. I didn't mind the mess. In the past, blood had signaled something being taken away from me, but now, it signaled new life. Dante and Bella were my new beginnings. The old Edward that wasn't capable of love and only cared about himself was long gone. My heart was so full of love for my family.
Wrapping my arm around my wife and son, I helped them out of the pool. The room smelled great, not like the usual hospital disinfectant. I was glad that my babydoll decided to have a water birth at home. This was an experience that I would never forget.
"Edward, you look a little pale. Why don't you go take a shower and change," Esme suggested, shooing me along.
I was about to protest, but Rose gave me a slight nod. My mom and sister were right. The sooner I got clean, the sooner I could get back to my baby boy and wife. Sighing, I went to one of the guest rooms.
After taking the world's fast shower, I threw on some comfortable shit. When I got back to the bedroom, my babydoll was holding court like a queen and cuddling our little prince. Carefully, I sat on the edge of the bed. I knew that she had to be fucking sore and exhausted after the long hours of labor.
"I love you, babydoll," I said, kissing her forehead. "You're beautiful. And our son…"
We both stopped to stare at our miracle. Dante Emanuel Charles Anthony Cullen was an angel sent from heaven, like his mom. Just seeing him made me feel happy. It was like he exuded peace.
D.C. was crying when Bella passed him to me. As I looked down at him, I thought about all the things I wanted him to be. My choice to join the Mafia was my own. One day, Dante would have a choice. I hoped like hell that he didn't follow in my footsteps. I had visions of him becoming a doctor, like Carlisle. Really, it didn't matter what profession he chose; I just wanted him to be a better man than me.
My babydoll smiled, helping me along. "You're doing great, daddy. Remember to always support the head." A fissure went through my heart when she said daddy. Of all the names I'd been called in life, that was the best one.
"Hi, D.C., I'm your daddy, Edward. I promise to love you forever and long after. You're my firstborn, mi figlio. Ti amo, Dante.
He wrapped his tiny little fist around my fingers. It was official: Dante owned my ass. I vowed then and there that no harm would ever befall him. If there was ever a circumstance where I had to give my life for my son, I'd go willingly.
Mesmerized, I watched him interact with the rest of his family. Love shone on all their faces. I knew he was going to be one spoiled baby. I planned to give him the best, too.
Suddenly, my mom said something about my thirtieth birthday.
I kissed Bella's neck. "Dante is the best gift I could ever get. Thank you, Bella."
Because her fucking hormones were all out of whack, she started crying again. I knew it would be a long ass time before I got any pussy or even head again. Emmett had already told me about the life of a new father. From now on, I was the second most important in my babydoll's life, and I wouldn't have changed that for the world.
Finally, Dante was placed back in his mother's arms. My brother began to laugh. I was feeling especially possessive, so I made a smart-ass remark. Then, Em explained why he was laughing. Sure enough, my son was giving a full on middle finger salute.
Mentally, I was cheering, Fuck, yeah, D.C.!
As Bella turned red, I fucking lost my shit, laughing while tucking Dante's finger back into the palm. "Well, he's definitely my son."
About fifteen minutes later, the midwife ordered everyone out so that Bella could breastfeed. I smirked, imagining it. I had built it up to this big thing in my mind. Of course, I had seen breastfeeding videos before but never in person.
Mi figlio was rubbing his tiny head against Bella's engorged tits. Clearly, he was a very smart baby. My babydoll glowed prettily, smiling over at me. She was wearing a beautiful nightgown. I pulled down the strap, exposing her large milk white globes. My mouth watered and my cock jumped.
Down, boy. There won't be any love for you for a while.
My dick and I were going to have to have a long conversation about inappropriateness one of these days.
To lighten the mood and help my babydoll relax, I gave a warning to my boy. "Dante, I'd like you to remember I'm only loaning you these for a short time, and I expect to get them back in the same condition."
He needed no help latching on, again proving he was my son. We didn't need fucking instructions to find a tit. Like a starving man, he devoured my babydoll's nipples. She had a serene look on her face as she played with his small hand.
Later, after Bella and Dante fell asleep, I was high on adrenaline, enjoying the view from my window. The dawn was just about to break. Suddenly, I was pulled from my musings by a shrill cry and my babydoll calling for me.
As I walked into the room, I thought about how good it felt to be needed. Luckily, my wife and son were safe, happy, and truly loved. Today, I'd taken on the most important job of my life. Father.
Donward is really a big soft marshmallow at heart. Review and baby Dante will give you dream kisses. Don't review and you will get angry Bella yelling at you. It's your choice, lovelies.